Starchild

This is something I wrote about a year ago. Wasn't sure I wanted to publish it anywhere, as it was an emotional piece of writing. After the challenges of tonight, I think it's a good reminder for me and something I want to read regularly. We all need to remember how precious our time is, and how lucky we are to spend time with loved ones:



~~~~~~~~~~~Starchild~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Tonight you cut milkshakes out of an ad, while I read online.
They became a smoothie shop upon the top of my doumbek, silenced by your imagination.
You called, I typed. You called again "Mom, order a smoothie."
I sighed and bade your command.

Watermelon it was. All swirly and pink with a cherry on top,
in an environmentally unsound plastic blue cup.
A swirly, pink former-ad; two dimensional and very real to you.
I typed more, you sold me smoothies over and over.

I should have stopped typing. I should have drank in every detail,
for that very moment will never exist again. I should have ordered
more smoothies and laughed more and kissed that sweet cheek
a few more times.


You sleep, gently breathing in dreams and stardust,
your head rolled wearily to the side in utter abandon.
One hand lies upon the nightgown of your Grandmother,
now gone two years. The very nightgown she took to the
hospital from which she would not return.

My sweet starchild, who sang to that Grandmother
while she battled her illness, my starchild who listened
to Grandma's stories, rubbed her feet and tucked her in
each night, is now comforted by that article of clothing
that still carries her energy.


Blue-green silk swathing your cheek, a bittersweet reminder
of the journey we all must take. You see things I can't see,
you dream of things I can't touch. The very heavens seem
to swirl through your breathe and angels bend to kiss your sleeping brow.


I held the keys to life within my womb, you grew and took the secrets with you
out into the world. Such sweet agony to birth perfection
and know that death will claim you too.


I must remember each day that drinking paper smoothies
is more important than we can ever imagine,
that every moment gifted is more precious than we know.
My perfect children, my sweet starchild, you remind me to truly live.