I was hired by MAC cosmetics in August, not long after my last journal entry. Basic training was held in Birmingham, so I had to be gone for the week of August 30-Sept. 4th. First time I was away from Jalen overnight....I think the first time I was gone from Sierra overnight too actually!! It wasn't easy, but I sure love the work. Sometimes I have to pinch myself, that I actually get payed to mess with colors and be creative.:) A friend came and helped Mark take care of the house and kids while I was gone...she and her little boyl are staying over here again, this time to flee a bad home situation. We're trying to help her get work and a home over here so they can start over. Her sonl is the most amazing two year old I think I've ever met. He can read ANYTHING, often surprising me at the darndest times, like when he reads something I'm looking at. He talks and looks like a two year old, so it's rather shocking when he starts reading the evening paper with clarity. He's also rather academic, preferring fact books about mushrooms or rocks and minerals to storybooks. I think his soul has been around a few times.
As to recent political happenings....
I continue to be dismayed at the direction my country is heading. It seems that we're destined to destroy ourselves from within, giving up all of our rights because of fear. Fear is the destroyer. Fear makes people easy to control. Fear is the motivating factor in all the recent decision making of this country it seems. The "Patriot Act" is proof of the American willingness to give up civil liberties for the illusion of safety. In Benjamin Franklin's words: "Those who would give up essential Liberty, to purchase a little temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety."
I just don't understand how anyone in their right mind can think this attack on Iraq was justified in any way. We have killed more Iraqis, than Americans that were killed in 9/11, and the Iraqi people had nothing to do with the attack on our soil!! What have we come to?WHY? is the question I want to scream at our President....WHY?And now the world just hates us more.
Bush was re-elected this month, I spent a week so depressed I could hardly talk about it. I cried, then I got pissed. These idiots are stealing my country! I'm considered anti-American because I dissent with my corrupt government. But isn't that the very basis of freedom? The freedom to dissent with ones government? How on earth is it anti-American to voice disagreement, but somehow it's patriotic to bomb the hell out of a country that wasn't a threat to us?WHY?I could say so much on this topic. So many things I've researched about fraudulent voting practices and corruption, so many days I've felt hopeless about this great country of ours.
I wouldn't mind heading for New Zealand about now. It seems we're headed for a Christian theocracy/police state from the looks of it...get me off the Titanic please. Oh wait no, it's going to be fascism with Bush and his cronies in charge. Mega congloperations are having a hay-day.
So...back to more local topics. Trying to focus on our little corner of the world and how to make it better. Like helping friends that need us, and helping my children's days be full of joy and peacefullness.
Went to the Andy Warhol exhibit at the Museum of Art with Sharon and Izzy. Perfect weather, lovely company. Sierra had packed some pens and paper along, and while we waited for them to show, we had our own little art attack on the front steps of the museum. Jared was mucking about with his shoe, trying to make a print and then outline it. Sierra was doing her typical fashion drawings and Jalen was wavering between drawing and hanging from the handrail.:) The exhibition was full of typical Warhol work, and some that I hadn't seen before, more ethereal and enchanting than most of his work. I'm sure he tried not to put emotion into it, but it was enchanting nonetheless. Came home inspired to learn more about him, remembering his death when I was in High school and all....got more details about his life and work. Now I'm ready to go back and see the exhibit all over again.
I feel very stifled right now, like life is keeping me from creating the writing and art I'm meant to create. The latest political happenings have me very inspired to create work that shakes people to the core, that makes them want to get up and DO something, that makes a social statement of some kind.
Ok, it's not life, it's me that 's keeping me from doing the work I need to do. I have to own that and find ways to create the things that are within. In not creating these works, it harms my soul in a way that is hard to explain. These things are simply being channeled through me, and if I try to stop them it's really unhealthy. I must listen to these urgings, or risk the feeling that all is not well in my world, that something is missing. When I respond to the writer/artist call, I feel balanced, sane and strong. There are certain things we just can't ignore. Promise to self: Finish up description of "Awakening the Dragon" and start buying supplies. Find a venue and date to start class!!Ok, that's a good start. I need to teach the class. I need it for ME and I know others need it too. I need to find my way back to myself. Too much is at stake...my soul knows what it is here for, I only need listen.
Ren the Mum